Children Matter

“Let the children come to me.” Jesus

“Whoever welcomes one such child in my name welcomes me.” Jesus

“The real integration of children into our lives is happening all across the world – just not very much in Western society. Here we have forgotten that there is really no higher calling than to raise a child. We tend to do a lot for our children but not nearly enough with our children.”
Wes Stafford, Too Small to Ignore, p. 33

Definition of failure: “to succeed at something that doesn’t really matter.” Stafford, p. 93

I’m becoming more and more aware of how often I succeed at things that really don’t matter. Stafford calls that failure. I’m having a hard time arguing with that perspective.

Hardly anyone would disagree with the statement that children matter. It is never a ‘failure’ to invest in the life of a child. We would all affirm the importance of children and the priority they ought to be in our lives, churches, and communities. Children matter.

God has helped affirmed their importance and stated some things that really turned our understanding upside down. He said things like, “unless you become like this child, you will never enter the kingdom of heaven” or “you need to have faith like a child.”

For me, the rubber meets the road in the midst of the daily requests I receive from John for my attention. Whether its Uno or Frisbee golf or playing a computer game or reading, John always has a plan for my life. I’m often torn. I often don’t want to do what he wants me to do. I also have a plan in my head for my own life. I have ideas about the things that I want to do. John rarely if ever wants to buy into my plan, and sadly, my plan often involves doing something on my own.

To succeed at something that doesn’t really matter is failure. So often my plans fit into this category. I’m definitely drawn to them. They keep my attention and entertain me, but they almost always don’t matter.

John matters – more so than most of the rest of my life – but in the day to day life it is tempting to lose sight of living this out. It is easy to say that John matters and that being a parent is one of the highest callings I have, but the proof is shown in how I live. Do I live out how much he matters? Do I invest in him not only in the games we play but in the conversations we have? Am I “training him up in the way he should go”? Am I modeling a commitment to prayer, God’s Word, caring for others, being a godly husband, serving, listening, etc.? I know that is a lot to consider, but it matters. This is the stuff that really matters.

John’s not going to remember how many times he beat me in Uno or how many fish we caught or how many books we read or all that we talked about. But he will remember whether or not his dad spent time with him. He will become the man that he’ll become due in a large part based on the dad he had. And he will also form ideas, impressions, values, beliefs, etc. based significantly on the ideas, values, beliefs, and impressions of his dad.

I can’t lose sight of the gift I have in John. It’s not just about doing my part so that he turns out well, it’s enjoying the gift it is to be a part of his life. There is more joy to be found here than in the multitude of others plans I create for myself that really have no eternal significance.

Every child (yours and mine and those in between) matters.