Teammate vs. Referee

A friend of mine is helping coaching middle school football. It has given me a chance to live vicariously through him as we’ve talked about coaching and team and football. It’s been fun for me, and I think he is really enjoying not only the experience but the relationships (with students, coaches, parents, etc.).

Sports like football have rules. Without the rules, it would be like Calvinball. (You’ll know what I’m talking about if you are a fan of Calvin & Hobbes. If not, ignore my reference and read on.) Calvinball had no rules. You made them up as you went. It was chaos.

Football has rules. There are boundaries. There are sidelines and end zones which mark the field of play. You don’t play outside of these boundaries. There are specific ways you score points. There are limits to the number of players on the field. There is a limited amount of time the game is played. You have equipment you must wear and rules you must follow. Otherwise, you are penalized for not following the rules. SO, there are referees that exist to enforce the rules during a game. We might not always agree with their decisions, but they have final authority when it comes to enforcing the rules.

Often, we love the referees when they call something in our favor or when they penalize the other team. We don’t love the referees when they call something NOT in our favor or they penalize our team. They get yelled at a lot. It is not an easy job, but it is an important job to make sure the game is played by the rules.

There are also players – teammates. These are the people who are actually on the field of play who have to abide by the rules of the game. They get to hit, tackle, run, block, pass, etc. They get to enjoy the exhilaration of the game as well as deal with the emotions of winning and losing. The referees don’t do any of this. They don’t get to play. They watch and manage the game and make sure the rules are followed.

Following Jesus is like playing football. (That’s probably not a sentence you’ve heard before, but stick with me.) Yes, I know, you don’t really get to hit and tackle, but in many ways, following Jesus is similar to playing the game of football. There are rules to follow. There are boundaries to keep. There are certain things we do that are penalized because they are breaking the rules. We are on a team. It is not an individual sport. We experience ups and downs throughout the experience. Unlike a football game, which lasts for 60 minutes, following Jesus is a game that lasts a lifetime. There is a start, but not really a finish. It may not be about winning and losing in the way a football game is, but it is about living and dying. When we play we find what it is to live, and amazingly so, we also have the opportunity to invite others out of the stands and into the game. We have the chance to encourage others to move away from dying and into living.

There is a referee, too. However, unlike the football refs, this referee is perfect. He never makes a bad call. He is always working toward helping and encouraging the team to succeed. We may not always enjoy his input in our lives when we are breaking the rules, but we can know he is always making the right call and always seeking to help us grow and enjoy the game even more.

Part of the challenge we face in playing this game of life is the temptation to take over for the referee. We are all tempted to be referees. We like wearing the striped shirts, blowing our whistles, and pointing out the infractions in others. Our sinful nature has a propensity toward judgmentalness, so we are very prone to taking on the role of referee in the lives of others.

It is not our job. We are teammates not referees. Teammates are in the game. Referees are not. God has given us the rules and boundaries so that we experience His life - that’s when the game is most exciting, meaningful, and joyful. He did not give us rules so we could all become referees – pointing out each other’s faults and shortcomings.

I’m not denying the important role that accountability and tough love play. Any good team recognizes how important it is to hold each other accountable to playing the game to the best of our ability AND playing the game as a TEAM.

It is one thing for a fellow teammate, who you know loves you and is committed to your success, to challenge and encourage you in a different direction or point out a place where you are falling short. It is quite another story when someone wearing a striped shirt and blowing a loud whistle – not on your team and not in the game – begins pointing out all of your shortcomings and faults.

If you are not following Jesus, but believe it’s your job to tell others how they need to change, then you are a referee. You need to get in the game and on the team.

If you are following Jesus, play as a team. Be teammates.