Holy Conversations

I have a book I’ve been hesitant to read in my pile. It’s titled Fierce Conversations: Achieving Success at Work and in Life, One Conversation at a Time. It’s by Susan Scott and on the cover it defines fierce as robust, intense, strong, powerful, passionate, eager, unbridled. Can you see why I’ve been hesitant?

At our recent Ridder retreat, the phrase “holy conversations” came to the surface and it has stuck with me. We were challenged with this statement, “Fostering holy conversations in the life of the congregation is a primary leadership task.”

What is a holy conversation?

I believe a holy conversation is a God-led, God-initiated conversation that has the potential for those involved to grow. This growth is not simply the acquisition of new information, but this growth is personal. I become a better person because of my willingness to enter into these holy conversations because I open myself up to the work God desires to do in me through relationships with others.

Holy conversations tend not to be easy conversations, but they can be the most important conversations we have with each other.

Here are a few examples:

A father and son have a broken relationship, unwilling to talk. Yet a holy conversation is what can bridge the gap that has separated them.

A spouse is struggling with their husband/wife’s behavior and it is breeding separation in their relationship. A holy conversation is needed to help heal what is broken.

A person is struggling with me or the church about something that has happened and is tempted to talk with everyone else. A holy conversation takes places when we talk to the person or people we are struggling with.

Two friends have been friends for a long time, but they have never talked personally about their faith and the challenges and joys of following Jesus. A holy conversation can help their relationship be a place of support and encouragement in each other’s faith.

A person is feeling alone and struggling with any sense of direction and hope in their life. He or she feels like they are losing their faith. A willingness to ask for help from a friend and admit how they feel is the beginning of a holy conversation.

Sharing with a friend or family member about the joy that you are finding in this life – the thankfulness you feel for what God is and has been doing is the beginning of a holy conversation.

I make it a habit of asking people in my life how I can pray for them, and am willing on the spot to pray with them. What a way to begin a holy conversation.

Holy conversations are grounded in authenticity. They are filled with truth. They are honest, heartfelt and often difficult to have. They force us to act in integrity and they spur us on toward living a life of faith. They take us into unknown territory and they call on us to have courage and to act in obedience. They involve feelings, fears, confession, forgiveness, encouragement, hopefulness, trust, and love. They lead us toward restoration, redemption, reconciliation, and grace. They are acts of love. Having holy conversations is a way we express love to the people around us. They take us to the core of what matters in life and they open the door to a level of relationship that God has created us to have – not only with him, but with each other.

Obviously, I am not suggesting ONE conversation clears everything up. No, it is a commitment to being a person who enters into holy conversations throughout our lives. We have them at home and work. We have them with friends, family, and each other. We commit to moving beyond the superficial. We move beyond hiding the truth. We move beyond the temptation to gossip and complain. We, in love for Jesus and each other, initiate and welcome this level of conversation.

It won’t be easy. But in the end, it will be good.

I bet that God is encouraging you to have some holy conversations with some folks in your life. I bet it is God that is spurring you on to have them. Will you be obedient to His nudging? Will you take the risk and act in faith? Will you open yourself up to this level of conversation? Will you trust God that if He is calling you to into this place, that He will not only equip you, but He will bless you through it?

Jesus was the model of one whose conversations were always holy.