"Daddy, let's cuddle."

“Daddy, let’s cuddle.”

It was getting late. It was close to the time John (our 6 year old son) needed to start getting ready for bed. His routine is about a half an hour process before he actually is lying in bed with the lights off. And he is good at every stall tactic imaginable.

My son is good at making requests in the final moments before it is time for bed. “Can I have a snack?” “Can we play a short game?” “Can I watch AFV (America’s Funniest Videos)?” He is a little man who always has hope that he’ll get to do ONE MORE THING before he’s off to bed.

I had just sat down with my feet up on the bed. I had my laptop in my lap and I was excited to check the scores and highlights of all the sporting activities (especially Twins) that had been taking place that day.

“Daddy, let’s cuddle.”

“Not right now, John.”

“Awwwwwwwwww,” groans my son.

And then the voice of my conscience spoke audibly. (Her name is Alisa by the way and she is my wife.) I hear her say from a distant room, “You’re not going to snuggle with your son? It won’t be long and he won’t want to do this anymore.”

I don’t always like what my conscience has to say, but she was right – again. So I hopped in bed with John. He just sat right next to me and was playing with one of his toys. No talking, just touching – being together.

Cuddling and 40 year old men who are into sports is an interesting connection. But John needs it, and I believe his Dad does too. There is something good about being together, being silent, and being close. It is interesting because what is communicated is powerful and it has no need of words. What is said is, “I love you. I love being with you. I need to be with you.”

One of the other things I’ve noticed about cuddling (being the expert I am) is that it is often in these times that the words that are spoken are the most meaningful. It is when John and I are close that he asks some of the deeper questions. “Is God here, Daddy?” “Why are some kids mean to me?” “Why do you have to go to work so much, Daddy?”

The depth of communication changes – for the good – both in being present and silent – but also in the meaningful conversations that sometimes result.

John, once again, has found a way to help me to grow. John, once again, has taught me some things about life and relationships because he is much more willing to express his needs.

Here is a critical one for me: I have to disconnect. I am amazed by the draw of connection which now affects me. Whether it is the TV or internet, I am discouraged by how much I desire to be connected. In fact, I would say it another way. I am distracted. I like being distracted. I like having my attention drawn to these things, but I am distracted from much better things.

The other part that stands out is my need to be with my Father.

Ecclesiastes says it this way,

Guard your steps when you go to the house of God; to draw near to listen is better than the sacrifice offered by fools; for they do not know how to keep from doing evil. Never be rash with your mouth, nor let your heart be quick to utter a word before God, for God is in heaven, and you upon earth; therefore let your words be few. (5:1-2)

It is not a question of whether we should draw near to God; it is a question of how. We need to come, but we need to come as one of the created before the Creator, as a finite human being before an infinite God, as a child before his or her Father. We need to come and honor, respect, and LISTEN to Him. So it will always mean we come and be silent. Silence has to be a part of coming into the presence of God. We need to hear what he has to say far more than we need to speak. He has the words of life, encouragement, direction, hope. We don’t.

And like John, we just need to be in the presence of our Dad. We may have trouble using the word “cuddle” but we need to be next to Him. We need to remember He’s there and with us. And we need to hear him say, “I love you. I love being with you. You need to be with me.”

If silence has no place in your life, that needs to change. If your relationship with God consists of talking at him, that needs to change. Please don’t hear this challenge as an attempt to guilt you into acting, but instead here this challenge as an invitation from Him. He is inviting you to spend time with him, to be still and know He is God, and to bring you to the place where you will be filled.

It’s time to disconnect. It’s time to stop being distracted. It is time to make Him the focus of your attention.